Sunday, July 13, 2008

...walking backwards towards the future...

...it was a really long journey of awakening. roadblocks everywhere. accidents. but there was silence. nobody said anything. but being aware of it is enough. it was indeed silent but meaningful. it was a nite i was so worried. about safety, about whatever may go wrong, just about it. but the call was reassuring enough for me. the voice on the other end of the phone were convincingly clear that nothing will go wrong. i am in a way glad but worried. i was drowned in much intoxicants that i had a hangover the next morning; didnt sleep well. think too much with alot of what could have happened.
next morning hangover was brought over to counselling. attended counselling; not being counselled but a counselling workshop. pretty not bad i guess. mostly was blur to me due to my intoxicating paracetamol that didnt really do a good job. arggh, so hard to keep awake despite all the good speakers, great lectures and wonderful learning experience. what a complete waste. wakakaz. but enough. i learnt one simple thing.
most of the time we go towards the future by walking backwards. why are we facing the other way around when we go towards the future. we should be facing the future and walk towards the future. and i think that is a dem great philosophy. i feel so light now.
feeling light and breezy, went to one-step to find dn and jt for dinner. ended having a dem long lecture (that was what jt calls it) that lasted more than 3 hours. i feel more lighter. wakakaz. jt felt much heavier. so to lighten jt, we called in bhante to do some blessings. sitting under the tree, infront of sky, bhante did his magic. bhante is indeed bhante. dem gengz bhante. one word of wisdom kautim. ride to nilai was much lighter; we all indirectly scored a goal. and its easier to move on then...

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